Saturday, May 25, 2013

What If?

He saved my life.
Then he sent flowers.
Called.
Wrote.
Visited my hospital room.
But I can't talk to him.
I said he triggered horrific flashbacks.
I might have lied.
For my fiancé?

12 comments:

  1. The question mark at the end throws me off a little bit. The rest of the words move smoothly through the emotion, and are very clear to me. Is the last line supposed to indicate it might not have been for the character's fiance', but rather for herself?

    I like the premise you built this from. :-)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, that is the purpose of the "?". Thanks for your comment. :-)

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  2. Interesting and complex... this is a great use of 33 words!

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  3. oooh, YOU, you have opened a sort of Pandora's box with this. Intriguing.

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  4. I say dump the fiance if he can't handle your admiration of the person who rescued you. Good job.

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  5. Impressive...you told a complicated story in just 33-words. My mind is going through a dozen more 'what ifs' and 'I wonders' now :)

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  6. I want to know where the fiance has been while the other guy is bringing flowers.

    Great piece!

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  7. Great prompt!

    So... I'm holding my breath... What's happening next???

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  8. Very cool. When things get complicated...

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